my life

Well, its been awhile since i last blogged on friendster n yes i plead guilty to logging on more on facebook instead..:) there has been alot of changes, we have finally decided to move out to our own place next year..YES!! I have had it with living here.. not like its really unbearable.. but my SIL has been driving me n my family up the wall with her endless nonsense..and the worst thing is that she is pregnant again.. she cant even make apple juice or porridge for her daughter who is 3 now and she is having another.. man, this is the drama that im not gonna stay and watch.. to my MIL my SIL is the victim, “boohoo! im a freelance insurance agent who has to work so hard to make ends meet cos my useless hubby who is an airforce regular who doesnt make enough to support us and yet we can have enough $ to go on at least 2 holidays (to japan and thailand) within the last 8 mths.. who the fuck will believe that ppl like that doesnt have enough $.. FOOLS! And everyone is manuiplulated in silence, OMG! She has the cheek to ask my FIL to buy insurance from her cos she couldnt meet her target, what a loser! I cancelled my policy even at the expense of a small loss but Im happy becos i will not condone her actions and contribute to her income.. she is freaking pregnant not disabled, god she cant even feed her daughter porridge!! she is a useless fark who is just simply wasting earths resources.. i hope she reads this cos she will knw im talking abt her and yes im talking about u useless fark!!

its a time of mixed feelings once again… in less than 48 hrs I will be delivering my 2nd boy in my world.. its always times like these like you know you will be undergoing an operation under GA that makes you realise how precious life is.. i have a fear to confess that i will never wake up again to see my precious bunz, my hubby, my new baby and all the people i love.. seriously life is unpredictable, you’ll never know what will happen in that 60mins of proceedure. The thought of it already brings tears to my eyes. Guess i’m also partly emotional that i’m pregnant.. Yet again I feel happy and excited to be able to see another product of our love.. But I tell myself I must be strong for my boys, to wake up although will be in pain but to grit my teeth and go through it cos I have been through it once I can do it again.. To be able to bring up my kids perfectly seems like impossible but I strive to be a perfectionist.. Although sometimes there are f-king annoying people who hinders along the way but we will survive.. Based on this, I will be strong and prepare for the arrival of Tobey!! The Sims rule!! The Chuas sux!!

My best friend just got married 2 days ago.. i mean she ROM last year but the actual dinner took place 2 days ago.. as we watched some old pics from our past being played on the projector during dinner, we have all grown up so much over the years and we are all embarking on different paths in our lives.. really miss the times when we were all in school and having nothing but fun.. well we all had a good time getting together during and after the dinner, we went for drinks at Lunar till 4am.. my god! I cant even recall when was the last time I was up and out till morning, obviously was damn tired by the time we got home, and bunsy woke me up at 7+ for his milk.. I almost died.. had to work for a tasting on sat evening..luckily managed to catch some rest today.. poor bunsy didnt get to go out much feel so guilty.. he will be 17mths old in 2 days time.. he is babbling alot now hopefully he can talk really soon, cant wait to have a conversation with him

its already 1219am & I’m still awaiting e return of my hubby…apparantly he is out wif his colleagues having dinner & drinks.. my MIL is eating chips, drinking beer, reading her lianhe wanbao & updating me on this big fish dat this man caught in china that is worth 10K in Spore.. sweet.. wat a way to spend a friday nite.. 2 years ago i should be getting intoxicated wif alcohol & cigs at a club at this time.. hee.. those were e days..now a normal day for me will be work, rush home n attend to my prince’s needs & after his highness sleeps, I have to clear e rest of his things…although its alot of hard work & effort but when he smiles,clings on to me n calls me "mama", its all worth it..well guess I’m really 100% mummy now.. gone were e days of a party ger..haiz..

Life wif Bunsy for 6months and 12 days have been nothing but fulfilling… Seeing him smile or wiggle in excitement when he sees u after a long day’s work makes it all worthwhile… First it was getting used to him, den feeding was a problem, den sleeping disorder, den introducing solids and finally dealing wif a sick bb.. Poor snookums was down wif a stomach virus and fever on sat morning, he was burning up at 38.7 degrees! I was so worried i cried n my loving hubby laughed at my helplessness.. We rushed to the clinic and the weekend whizzed by in a blur state of endless checking of his medication and meal times…He was constantly whining and wanting to be carried and I do not blame him as I would react the same way if I didnt know how to talk and let my parents know that Im suffering .. but luckily he is recovering well and seemed to be back to his normal self today morning hope he stays this way… Im still in office waiting for my hubby to pick me up.. Talking abt my hubby he seems mean to me sometimes but he loves me lotsa by his actions.. seems like i got the typical "I LOVE U" but i dun need to express it all the time guy… love love honey.. remember our promise, no friendster account = meimei…..

Seems like only yesterday dat i started my maternity leave & TJ was kicking me in my tummy.. Now he is oredi 2mths 13days old and a terror.. Sometimes i feel like i cant wait to go back to work n go back to my normal lifestyle although it wont be e same wif TJ around, but yet i wish to stay at hm n be there whenever he cries, laughs even when he poos.. He is e world to me now..

The arrival of TJ was earlier den expected, he was supposed to be "born" on the 18 May 2006 but i guess he couldnt wait to see the world for himself.

Theodore Sim Hong Yi arrived officially on the 16 May 2006 after giving mommy a whole night of contractions. The agony of enduring through contractions the whole night, the trauma of preparation for the operation and the pain after waking up from the GA is totally indescribable. I cried immediately after regaining consciousness but when I saw him everything was worth it. He is now 16 days old today, a little rascal i must say, drives me up the wall but whenever he smiles, he melts my heart.

yep its been decided dat TJ will be coming out on the 18th May 2006 officially as I am opting for a C section. Call me defying nature or chicken but I dun think me going through freaking 10 over hours of labour pains is natural. As u all can see from my freaked out face in the photo courtesy of my hubby taken at a recent blood test, I am so not up to natural childbirth. No one will have any idea how difficult being pregnant is till u actually experience it yrself, the dramatic changes to your body, hormonal changes… but bottomline is u need strong support from your hubby. Mine is already used to my endless whining for my sugar rushes and he is handling the pregnant me pretty well now if you ask me especially my diet. As this preg issue is new to both of us and we have had our differences, by the 3rd trimester we are already acustomed to each others needs. Our next major project is our love nest and the arrival of our darling TJ…

ok im officially a "killer beachwhale" now, cant see my toes if i stand up straight, have trouble cutting my toe nails n bursting out of my normal clothes… ive put on 11kg ever since last sept, started wif 45kg now at 56kg.. OMG!! wat have i balloned to? will i ever be my old self again? i wallow in self pity day by day as my weight accerlates n my hubby is not making things any easier.. i have never felt not being desired before.. e feeling sux big time..sometimes actually most of e time i swear by my name dat i’ll never wan to be pregnant again, this is my first n last cos im a person who cares about my appearance more den anything else, but den on e other hand i wan a little ger to doll up n do girly stuffs with..but until then 1 is more den enough for me to handle..went for my first blood test last week n cried like a little kid, so humilating cant imagine going through labour, think i’ll rip my hubby’s limps apart unless i opt for a caesar..haha

within a week since my last blog n i’ve lost a loved one.. my grandpa passed away peacefully on e 2nd Feb 2006, he suffered a stroke for more den 20 yrs n has been 50% paralysed.. but his health has declined drastically for the past 2months, i remember offering him tea together wif honey afew days after my wedding at home n he was so happy for me, waving his red packets excitedly for us. The last time i saw him alive was when we went to visit him on e first day of CNY, although breathless most of e time but he could still recognise me, shake my hand, wished my happy new year n said bye bye when we wanted to leave, n dat was e last bye i ever said n heard him say to me. As emotionally prepared as i might have been for e worst, e departure of him will never fail to bring tears to my eyes. Only thoughts of him being reunited wif my grandma happily in heaven will comfort me…